Safety First

Today I have decided to share with the blogging community a personal philosophy of mine, that is, "Safety First". Now, you have probably heard this little saying before but I am going to write about how these two words can be applied to everything from international travel to guarding your heart. Here are AA (Amanda Approved) Safety Tips. ENJOY!

Daily Life:

- when dressing for the day, be conscious of dangers and or annoyances that might occur. For example, I wear shoes that I can run in or throw off in case of an emergency ie running from stalkers or earthquakes

- make sure you eat breakfast because who knows what will happen, you might not eat again!

Relationships:

- Background checks, police reports etc. THESE ARE VERY IMPORTANT. This is crucial when the man you are dating drives a different luxury car, with no license plates, every day that you see him.

- If you want to meet a random stranger at least go to place that is reputable. For example, if choosing a grocery store to flirt at, pick Bristol Farms over Ralphs. However, it is advised NOT to date a random stranger but an AA (Amanda Approved) candidate.

- First glance is key, make sure he meets all requirements before speaking, otherwise you are doomed to a dull conversation.

- Don't be afraid to get NOSY, check out his relationship history! The way to do this is to google his name and facebook stalk, not to mention casually bringing up his name among mutual friends. Then, gage their reactions to his name and if satisfied proceed, otherwise, run away in the shoes you wore this morning for such purposes.

Travel:

- When boarding a plane, ask the pilot how the turbulance will be and make sure he describes every detail of the entire flight to you personally. Also use this golden opportunity to make sure he is sober and capable. Otherwise RUN.

- When checking in for a flight, be sure to choose the seat closest to the wing, this is the most stable part of the plane.

- Sit next to a friendly stranger (who looks capable). I prefer ex-Marines or current members of the United States Army. Then you can rest assured that in an emergency YOU will be saved.

- Make sure to always gage your surroundings and if you see any strange guys are checking you out, that's not a potential love interest, that's a rapist that's going to kill you!

Like the boy scouts know, preparation is essential for survival. Ciao!

Things I Am Not

To the external world that may be interested in this bright mind of mine, let me tell you things that I am not. I am NOT some soap opera book on a shelf you pass by on your way to the Brawny paper towels and I resent anyone who might think of my fabulous life as such. Yes, I do have strict requirements for potential love interests and YES, I do have a check list for my life but thats not a bad thing. I am a feminist but I am not a man hater. I am a successful woman but I am not a threat to your masqulinity (assuming that men actually read this blog). Oh, who reads Perez Hilton? Ok, I admit, its a bit of a guilty pleasure but this man keeps celebrities alive and in the public eye so don't pretend like you don't like it. Anyway, let me tell you someONE that I am DEFINITELY NOT... Miss Miley "Soon to be Porn Star" Cyrus. This young "lady" has no self respect and I do not support her as a role model for pre-teen girls nor as a sex symbol for middle aged men. Someone I do support is Taylor Swift, this WOMAN has got class. She manages to be amazing while not flashing her privates to the world. Alright, ta ta for now ;)

What does Amanda Really Want? ... The World

What does any woman really want? A man. But I have specific requirements... which often contradict. I'm 5 foot 2 inches on a good day and a man needs to fit my 6 inch heel requirement, so really 5'8 is my short man limit but 6 foot is preferable. I want a man that can lift me with one hand (in case of an emergency where I would need to be lifted and moved quickly). It would be nice if this muscular hunk was also a doctor (so he can pillow talk with me over my symptoms) or something financially stable. Finances are very important. However I am not a gold digger, I am going to be a lawyer so I don't NEED a man, I just WANT one. Now the contradiction comes in my admiration for Justin Long. He's cute and quirky and I don't necessarily fantasize about him with his shirt off. It seems that an Amanda approved man would be tall, muscular, smart, rich, successful, AND quirky and cute with a dorkish sense of humor. I have my doubts that such a man exist, actually thats untrue, I believe he's out there but my friends do not have this same faith. Especially because my list of requirements is embarrassingly long. Here is just a preview: no drinking, no smoking, no tattoos, does service, ATTRACTIVE, not socially awkward, MUST BE DISEASE FREE, outgoing, feminist... there are more, but THE TOP MOST IMPORTANT FOUR: intelligent, funny, has to be a feminist and he has to be capable. He must be a really useful human being. And one that wants to do something in the world thats good, no playboys. OH and he has to be of a mixed race so I can have beautiful kids. You wanna hear about my bonus points? ... Oh nevermind, you know too much.

1st Day in the Blog World

Hi Everyone,

I'm a little nervous as I put myself out into the online world... mostly I don't want any personal information to become public or for creepy guys like the Korean airlines guy to send me not one but FIVE Korean airlines pocket mirrors in an attempt to "woo" me. But a good friend has assured me that this whole blog thing will help me to, well, stay sane as my life is spiraling into Bridget-Jones-without-the-hot-love possibility oblivion. Oh what's a girl to do. More to come. Cheers!